You know what’s the worst?

I hate it when I worry so much and then realize that it didn’t matter at all.  I’ve been feeling a lot anxiety this semester over this one class that I’m taking.  I’ve been worrying so much that it’s ruined some outings and time I spend away from school.  Right now I’m supposed to be studying hard for a midterm that I have on Tuesday, but it’s going so slow.  I was supposed to wake up super early and “get on it” but I didn’t start until 4 pm … P told me to not worry about what I didn’t do, but look at what I have to do.  I guess he’s right … I feel bad because I always cry about school, it’s really nothing in the end.  Sometimes it feels like I can’t breathe so I have to put my head between my legs and take deep breaths.  A few weeks ago it got so bad that I woke up with chest pains and that has NEVER happened before.

I should go study or else I’m going to feel worse … it’s so hard to not feel anxious.

One more day

Tomorrow is my birthday and I get a text from P today saying he doesn’t know what to get me.  To his credit, I’m difficult to shop for so that’s why I don’t ask for gifts.  If I want something, I’ll just buy it myself.

3 more days

• 3 more days until my last exam and then I am free until next semester!!  All I think about is all the dinners and desserts that I will be consuming.
• 3 more days until I’ll be relaxing and doing absolutely nothing without feeling guilty.
• 3 more days until I can go to sleep at a normal time (re: before 3 am).

On a side note:

• I bought lotion while waiting an hour for a friend.  I never have lotion on me when I need it so I bought 3 bottles for $10.  I’m going to leave a bottle in the bags that I frequently use.
• 24/7 Flyers/Rangers isn’t as good as Penguins/Caps series.  Sure the coaches swear more, but it’s not the same.
• I guess I should get back to studying.

Simple Logic

The longer I spend procrastinating, the longer that I have to stay up studying.

Financial Bucket List

I have come up with a Financial Bucket List so I can win the $500 Give Me Back My Five Bucks competition, sponsored by Life Insurance Finder, the life insurance experts.  Here’s what I want to do:

1. Put away a portion of my income towards a purchasing a condo in the next 5 years.  I currently work part-time so I do not make a whole lot of money at the moment, so it’ll be tough to do this, but I will find a way.  Also, I don’t plan on working full-time during the summer so I have to watch my spending.
2. Buy a home, when the time is right.  A condo will be fine when it’s just me and my boyfriend, however, I do eventually want to have a family.  I don’t think a condo will accommodate a family of four.  The only issue is where to buy the house; Vancouver is definitely out of the question since I would need to make at least $100K+ a year to afford a mortgage that is to be paid off in 25 years.  I guess I could go for a 40 year mortgage, but I want to get the house paid off ASAP.  I guess I’m looking in the area of Burnaby or the developing Surrey area.
3. Put another $5K towards my TFSA.  My parents/grandparents have been encouraging me to put money towards this account since I don’t make enough money now to contribute to RRSPs.
4. Start up RRSPS, when I get a real job.  RRSPs will be my only income once I retire, since I’m not going to rely on CPP to provide me with enough money to survive on.  Hopefully when I have a real job, I can contribute 10% of my income to RRSPs.
5. Use more coupons.  I think the TV show, Extreme Couponers makes me want to use coupons more.  However, the restrictions here are a lot more strict than those in the states.  By using more coupons on things that I need, I will be able to save more money and put it towards my first and third goals on my list.
6. Buy a car.  I don’t plan on living in downtown and I’m not a transit kind of person.  I’m not sure if I want to get a brand new car or a used car.  My parents usually buy their cars brand new and run them into the ground.  My boyfriend on the other hand buys his cars used.
7. Put away money for more education.  As I’ve learned in my education class, you never stop learning.  One day, I may want to go for a Masters degree and those do not come cheap.  I do not want to rely on my parents on money to pay for my tuition once I move out of the house.
8. Put away money for traveling.  I want to travel the world before I start having kids.  Once I have kids, all of our vacations will be planned to accommodate them.  There’s nothing wrong with Disney World/Land, but I want to see Europe, Asia and Australia and everything in between.

Tags: give me back my five bucks contest, life insurance finder

I don’t want to sleep

I don’t want to sleep in the fear that I won’t feel this content with my life tomorrow morning.  I wish there was a way to bottle this feeling and whenever I feel anxious I could just remember this feeling.

LFO – Goodbye Rich

For some reason I looked up LFO last night and found out that the lead singer Rich Cronin passed away last year from leukemia.  For some reason that news has stuck with me all day.  LFO was never that popular since they had a few hits (Sumer Girls and Girl on TV) and they disappeared.  Their music will always be associated with my childhood even though their music wasn’t that great.  I can’t believe I’m writing this, but I’m still in shock.

I’m feeling terrible.

I think I caught something from P or my body is just so tired.  I haven’t been this sick since 2009 when I had something similar to swine flu.  P tried to take care of me, but he got annoyed with my whining so I figured it was a good idea that I went home after pho.

I can’t believe that it has been a month since I’ve gone on my trip.  :(  There’s nothing to look forward to this summer, except for another trip to Alaska or Victoria.  I hope I can use those hotel vouchers in Victoria that I won.

Go Canucks Go!

Busy day

I have on more class before I’m off for the summer, so I took today as an opportunity to run some errands.  I went to go get a haircut because my bangs are out of control and my hair person was nice enough to lend me some perm serum so I can get my bangs to look the way I want to.  Then I went to see my doctor to see if I needed a Hep A shot, which I did need.  Thankfully my doctor had an extra vile of it so I didn’t have to go to the pharmacy to get it!  And then he gave me a tetanus shot too since the last time I got one was in grade 9.  Then it was off to see my trainer for a good workout.  Now it’s time to relax because starting tomorrow I have to study a lot because I have two finals in a day.

 

I wish I could have gotten in classes during the summer, I actually wanted to take summer semester for once.  But of course the classes got all full.

Sometimes I wonder

I wonder what people really mean when they say that I’m “hilarious,” is that just another way for them to say that I’m an idiot?  Sometimes when I say things, it’s not always meant to be hilarious, but of course I won’t say anything